Corks Wine Bar

Wagwarn peeps,

I didn't have time to write a blog yesterday - my bad, my bad...

So yesterday evening, I went to a comedy night at Corks Wine Bar, just off Oxford Street. My friend had told me that 'Russell Simmons' was going to be there doing some sort of Q&A, which kinda baffled me because I thought the concept of the night was for people to be laughing, not to have some serious discussion. Anyways, I couldn't get my head around the Russell Simmons turning up to this comedy place, and for a long time I managed to convince myself that it was Russell Peters who would be turning up instead. So it was extra disappointing when neither Russell turned up on the night.

The night was still jokes for the most part, but when I thought I was gonna be paying a fiver to get in and then discovered I would be paying £10 to NOT see the supposed big name in question, that really pissed me off.

The place was jam packed - according to my friend, it's never usually that busy so early. For once, BPT (Black People Time) was being encouraged! We had to queue for like 30 minutes at least before we got in. Baaaare black people up in the place - once again, I was acting as the token white chick. There was probably around 5 white people in total, but meh. We got a chance to big ourselves up when Kojo asked for "any white people up in the house?!". Needless to say, I didn't put my hand up, haha!

Oh yeah, can you believe I couldn't even get a glass of tap water?! Fucking made me sick... how can I ask one woman and she tells me it costs 50 friggin' pence, then when I come back with the 50p in hand, some next guy tells me they don't sell tap water. Errr... so why did your co-worker just tell me it cost 50p? Did she just make that up for fun? When he asked her in front of me, she could only reply with "I dunno". Rah, I'm dying of thirst, broke as a joke, and you can't even provide me with TAP WATER?! I've never been so offended in my life!

And omg omg omg, to top it all off - Darnell was in the building (!!!) and I DIDN'T get to meet him (arrgggghhhhh!) - it was all BULLSHIT! The closest I got to him was seeing his hairline on one of the screens. I left heartbroken.

Overall, there was a lot of negatives to the night unfortunately, including one embarrassing, obnoxious dude who wouldn't stop screaming things at the top of his lungs and generally making a tit of himself in front of hundreds of people. I had a bit of used chewing gum in between my fingers ready to pop in his champagne glass if he came anywhere near me, but luckily for him he stayed away.

Anyways, don't know if I'll be going back to this place because I felt ripped off after I thought I was gonna be paying £5 to get in. And not all of the comedians were as funny as they should have been - shout out to Eddie though!

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