I've said it before, and I'll say it again:
Jodie Marsh is actually demented.
No, really. I'm not mincing my words here. The woman's an absolute lunatic. She needs help!
What the FUCK has she done to herself with those hideous, bizarre tattoos?! She got one of Michael friggin' Jackson's HEAD for crying out loud, on her bloody arm! One wants to know exactly what she was thinking when she decided that would be a 'cool' tattoo to add to her already vomit-inducing collection.
Why, Jodie, why?! Why would you do such a thing?!!
I can't believe once upon a time I actually used to have some sort of respect for this moron. I guess I kinda liked the fact that when she first propped up in the (Z-list) celebrity world, she thrived on taking the piss out of Jordan in public, claiming to be 'keeping it real' with her, err, real tits. Although, that claim is now irrelevant seeing as she went and had plastic surgery anyway, with truly disastrous results might I add. Of course, she was going around looking like a complete slapper, belts covering her bits and all that, but there was something about her I quite liked!
Then I watched her on one of those loser reality TV shows (and yes, I know I'm even more of a loser for actually contributing to the viewer ratings), one that was about being a holiday rep or something. She entertained me somewhat, and she came across as quite down-to-earth and you know, up for a laugh and all that kinda crap.
Then she just became even more desperate, and her infamous Celebrity Big Brother appearance came next, and well, that didn't do her any favours. Fair enough, when you're living with an alleged murderer and all-round tosser Michael Barrymore, and someone with a tongue as vicious as Pete Burns, it ain't gonna be easy! But the girl doesn't do herself any favours... it's like she wants to be a undignified whore! And then there was that cringe-worthy pathetic MTV show she did, where she faked a romance with some dickhead guy and had the audacity to try and get a free wedding out it, costing other people thousands of pounds in the process. And when she got caught out, red-handed with evidence that was a big slap to her orange face, she lied through her teeth and denied it all.
I can't even pin point the moment where I began to actively dislike her, she's been involved with that much annoying nonsense in the press it's hard for me to remember. I've actually read her 'autobiography' - as much as I hate to admit that - and she went on about being such a smart girl and getting all these A's in her GCSE's and A-levels. How she comes from such a great family background, and how she resides in a lovely little Essex mansion with her mum, dad, brother and a bunch of marvellous wee doggies.
So if that's the case, then why did she feel the need to create a career out of getting her baps out for the lads every fucking five minutes?! You've got all these impressive qualifications on your CV, Jodie, and yet your claim to fame is when you wore nothing but a tiny belt around your saggy boobs to get shameless attention from the paps.
Now that's intelligence!