Jack Shephard vs. John Locke

What's good.

If you're a Lost fan (and if you're not, then you fucking should be), check out this fan made YouTube video that covers the history of the captivating relationship between Dr. Jack Shephard and the legend that is John Locke.



"I don't believe in destiny."

"Yes you do - you just don't know it yet."

Fucking love it!!!

All hail John Locke!

The Cut Issue 3 OUT NOW

It's finally here!

Ladies and gentlemen, I proudly present to you the brand new Cut magazine!

The Cut team have been working long and hard over the cold winter months to bring you the third issue of the most innovative and streetwise youth-led magazine in London town!

This time around, you can look forward to reading about the likes of Charlie Crockett, De Tropix, DELS, Ava Leigh, Crazy Cousins, Kyza Smirnoff and Boris Johnson.

Alongisde that, we've got pieces on Obama's presidential triumph, secret style histories, greyhound racing, modern slanguage, London's most talented young comedians and a 'Back to the Old School' themed fashion shoot.

Be sure to check out our website, where you will also be able to download a PDF file of the magazine.

http://www.thecutnewspaper.com/

Keep it greazy!

The Brits 09

So what did everyone think?

Personally... I kinda enjoyed it. Thought Matthew Horne and James Corden were hilarious (the Craig David boyage was too much LOL bless him), and Kylie was alright too.

Enjoyed the performances by Kings of Leon, Duffy and my favourite ladies Girls Aloud, brap! They finally got an award as well! Did you see how wasted Sarah was? HAHA!

But the performance that really smacked it was of course the Estelle and Ting Tings collabo - even though I'm fed up of hearing American Boy, it was a nice little mix that worked really well.

Surprised Katy Perry won the best international female award... where was Rihanna in the nominations?

So, soooo relieved Kanye won best international male! 808's and Heartbreaks is one hard album.

And was it just me, or did anyone else get confused about what decade we are in??? Neil Diamond, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, U2... WTF?! Old man rockers, go away! Especially you Bono! Actually you need to just die already. HOW ANNOYING IS HE?!

Anyways, that's my 50 pence on the matter. I will leave you with a YouTube link to the best performance of the night.

PEACE

FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY

That's all I gotta say.

And now I'm off to get hammered, hahaha!

The Cut Issue 3 - not long to wait now...

So I saw some previews of the new issue of The Cut magazine yesterday evening...

and I can tell you right now - it's gonna be the best one yet.

You can expect to see pieces on the likes of DELS, Crazy Cousins, Boris Johnson, Sarah Maple, Goldielocks, Emily Cummins, De Tropix, Kyza Smirnoff, Giggs, Tim Campbell and much, much more!

Issue 3 will be out VERY soon, so watch this space!!!

Anyone who wants to get involved with the mag (contribution, promotion, distribution), do not hesitate to get in touch.

Big up the whole Cut crew for all their hard work and dedication - it's a lot!

Check out these links in the mean time:

http://www.thecutnewspaper.com/

www.myspace.com/stowe_newspaper

And don't forget to check out our Facebook group 'The Cut Magazine!' and join our fan page!

Peace

Prince Harry needs to hold it down

So Prince Harry has started up yet another race row.

This time, he has been accused of racism after telling black comedian Stephen K Amos: "You don't sound like a black chap." at a celebration of Prince Charles' 60th birthday.

This was apparantly Harry's idea of congratulating Mr Amos on his successful performance.

First there was the fancy dress Nazi uniform, then there was the "our little Paki friend" comment, and now this.

Harry, I beg you shut your mouth man. You're giving us white people a bad name, as well as your own family and the upper class. You're meant to be setting a bloody example you fool.

How are young people today, living in the multi-cultural society that we live in, supposed to relate to the Royal family when shizzle like this comes out? They're so out of touch man, it's embarassing.

Fix up!

Hold tight Noel Clarke

I know I'm a bit late, but I just wanted to dedicate one of my posts to the main man that is Mr Noel Clarke for his BAFTA win the other day.

For those who don't know by now, Noel won the Orange Rising Star Award, which was voted for by the great British public.

Noel is quoted to have said:

"It speaks volumes about what is happening in the world. If I'm not testament that a council estate kid can do all right then I don't know what is."

Brrrrrrap! That's what I'm talking about peeps!

Grove council estate boy done good. He even went to St. Charles, haha! Now that is what I call an achievement.

Big up yourself Noel and keep doing your thing. You're an inspiration.

Give the Oscar to Mickey Rourke

So I went to see The Wrestler the other day.

Someone had warned me beforehand it was 'shit' and that the ending was possibly the worst ever. But I just didn't believe her, and I had been looking forward to seeing this film for weeks, so yeah I watched it.

And it was fucking good!

The cinema dude told us that it was an 'emotional' film and 'harder to watch' than our other choice, Slumdog Millionaire. And yeah, it was emotional but the emotion was understated I'd say, and it actually didn't make me cry - I expected to be balling my eyes out watching it! I think the saddest part was after he had that sweet dance with his daughter and then had a little heart-to-heart with her - that got me a bit choked.

I also didn't realise it wasn't gonna be a typical 'Hollywood' film with loads of cheesy bits in it - very much like professional wrestling also - but it was the complete opposite. And no one could have predicted that ending, whether they felt it was good or bad (I'm still debating that, but I'm leaning towards the 'good' side). Randy's loneliness was very well portrayed and I felt that it produced a realistic picture of the world of professional wrestling.

I think I'm gonna add this to my DVD collection when it comes out. I ain't even seen any of the other Oscar-nominated films (I am dying to see Benjamin Button though) but fuck it, give the best actor award to Mickey and the supporting actress award to Marisa Tomei because she was fucking great as well.

Peace out.

The Cut MySpace

Please check out the newly improved MySpace page for The Cut magazine:

http://www.myspace.com/stowe_newspaper

The Cut is an innovative and streetwise lifestyle magazine created and put together by young people from all backgrounds across London.

Issue 3 soon come!

K, I really don't like Lily Allen anymore...

Before I start bitching about Lily again, let's talk CBB first.

OMG I can't believe La Toya went first yesterday! I was certain she was going to make it to the final day. These Jacksons man, they keep surprising us! Everyone thinks they're a bunch of freaks with stretched plastic faces and bad nose jobs, then they come along out of nowhere with these softly-spoken voices and impeccable manners, and you just can't help but really like them!

The Jacksons are alright you know!

Anyways, La Toya didn't deserve to go first, I mean WTF, who is actually voting for Ben?!! Nice guy and everything... but THAT'S IT! NOTHING ELSE TO OFFER!

Even worse: WHO'S VOTING FOR ULRIKA?! Bloody hell, where is this secret support coming from??? All the woman does is pull miserable faces in the house, moping around in her velour pants and speaking to everyone like they're her kids! She better be out first on Friday...

Right back to the matter at hand:

Lily Allen.

Again.

Please, just shut the fuck up and stop embarassing yourself with DUMB and blatantly attention-seeking comments.

After the whole 'as long as you can go to work the next day, it's alright to take cocaine a few times a week' furore, now she's been banging on about having so-called regular 'lesbian experiences' and 'fantasies'.

"I did once snog these identical twins in San Diego. I was on the sofa and I had them both, I was dancing and shoving my a**e on one of them and one on my front bottom.

That’s the only time, but I do have wet dreams - lesbian dreams - quite a lot."

Yeah alright Lily, whatever you say.

Why didn't I see from the beginning this stupid broad just chats crap to get meaningless attention and cheap publicity?! I bet you she's the type of girl that would start lipsing random girls at a party or something just for the benefit of the boys who would be watching. I hate that shit.

So yeah Lily, just shut your mouth and stop begging attention for once in your life. You don't need to tell us about your lesbian fantasies and wet dreams to remind us that you exist. Just stick to writing your music and singing because you really don't need to talk as much as you do.

And on that note, I'm gone.

BLESS

Coolio or Terry to win CBB6

Hello all.

I haven't commented on CBB6 as much as I intended to, but oh well. The show's nearly done and the final's round the corner.

After Michelle's abrupt exist, we are now left with Terry, Coolio, Tommy, La Toya, Ulrika, Verne and the other fella. Haha.

I really hope Coolio or Terry win. Terry is simply the dog's bollocks - his knowledge of like, everything, is fascinating, and he's been fair and pleasant without being boring or a sap. Coolio has made CBB6, and if it wasn't for him being there the show would have sucked BADLY.

I mean, this one hasn't been as entertaining or gripping as past series. Compare it to the one with Pete Burns (bastard but hilarious nonetheless), Michael Barrymore (arsehole) and Dennis Rodman (legend), or the one with John McCririck, Bez and Brigitte Nielsen (all legends). Classic BB entertainment right there!

This one ain't been too bad though. We discovered that Tina Malone IS Mimi Maguire, Michelle from Liberty X cries a lot, and La Toya Jackson actually isn't a freak after all! She's kinda normal... and nice... and she has a banging figure for a 52 year old!

I really like Tommy as well but I know he's not gonna win - I thought I wouldn't like him but I was wrong. I guess I was just ignorantly basing my assumption on all that hassle he had with the NOTW. And you gotta love how he's been wearing the Scotland strip in there all the time, haha. REPPING! I can't understand why he's not that popular with the viewing public... ?

I like Verne too but I don't think he should win. I have a feeling a lot of his votes are gonna be the result of people who feel sorry for him because of his condition, and that ain't right or fair.

Please please PLEASE don't let Ulrika win! Oh my god, I think I would actually die of anger.

Get this: she's actually been referred to as a 'feminist icon'.

...

LOL feminist icon??? ULRIKA IS A FEMINIST ICON?!!

Get the fuck outta here! If 4X4 Ulrika is a feminist icon, we have SERIOUS issues in this world.

Get Ulrika out

Check out this gem of a quote from Ulrika Jonsson on Celeb BB uttered during a whispered discussion about Tommy Sheridan with Michelle Heaton:

"You know, if you have any dignity or class... *laughs* no but if you hold yourself as a serious politician, I don't believe you would put yourself in a showbiz environment."

...

I'm sorry... was that the Ulrika Jonsson talking about dignity and class?

Ulrika Jonsson?

Same Ulrika who had an affair with a cameraman from Gladiators when she was married to someone else?

Same Ulrika who had another affair with Sven Goran Eriksson?

Same Ulrika with 4 kids by 4 different baby-fathers?

Let's not forget the John Leslie saga...

And the bitch wants to talk about someone else lacking in dignity and class???

Have a fucking word!

My god, that woman is vile beyond belief. I think she may be on par with Jordan when it comes to hypocrisy - and that's saying something!

Get her saggy has-been arse out of the house ASAP please. She's a waste of bloody space.

Lily Allen is waste

Check this article out from Digital Spy:

Lily Allen has become caught up in a cocaine controversy by appearing to condone its use.

The singer claimed that friends who use the drug can still manage to lead a normal life.

"I know lots of people that take cocaine three nights a week and get up and go to work every day, no problem at all," the star told Metro.

"But we never hear that side of the story. I have no statement to make, I just wish people wouldn't sensationalise this thing that just exists.

"The only story is that drugs are bad and they will kill you - you will become a prostitute, a rapist or a dealer. But that's not true."

Despite admitting that she no longer uses the drug, Allen added that in previous times cocaine had been 'dished out' within the music industry.

"I'd have been booked in at the Ritz with five grams of cocaine on my table," she added.

********************

Seriously... do I even need to explain how STUPID she is???

What a fucking tool.

Why do people always try to make out cocaine is a 'nothing' drug? They treat it so casually, like it can't kill you.

Well I got news for you peeps - it bloody well can.

Oh yeah, just sniff a couple of times of week, as long as you go to work the next day, you'll be alright!

I can't believe she had the audacity to publicly say something like that. One minute she's like 'I'm off the drugs, drugs are bad, I'm off the booze, I'm so mature now, I go to art galleries and stuff' and then the next she's coming out with TRIPE like that! Unbelievable.

What's happened to this girl? I used to love her off back in the day, praise her every move. Don't get me wrong, I still think she's got talent and she knows how to sing. But she is just constantly taking the piss these days. I feel like I can't relate to her anymore.

If she ain't making a tit out of herself putting charlie up her conk, she's dating some scruffy old man old enough to her dad - or better yet, her dad's mate! Or she's posing in her underwear for GQ magazine (OK it wasn't that bad, but still!), or she's developed some annoying posh accent for her crappy BBC chat show! I mean, what was that all about?! She never talked like that before???

Lily, you're getting on my fucking nerves rudegirl. I feel like I ain't got time for you no more. I don't think I'm even buying the new album - I might just illegally download it, haha! You need to FIX UP and fast...

Bless.

Surviving Gazza

Happy new year everyone.

OK, so I just watched the Gazza documentary that was on Channel 4.

Interesting...

There's a few points I want to raise in regards to the programme that baffled me/amused me/angered me.

First of all - why did they keep going on about Gazza being the "kid's" father figure when he isn't even Bianca's and Mason's biological dad and he didn't exactly stick around for long when they were growing up? I thought it was funny and weird that his biological son thought the least of him and clearly didn't care too much to have a relationship with his dad. And who can blame him??? Gazza left when he was like, 18 months say, and on top of that, he beat the shit out of the boy's mum on various occasions. Why should he give a toss?

Then you've got the other two banging on about how he's still their 'dad' and how much they love him and how they'll never give up on him and bla bla bla.

Oh come off it! So you're standing up for someone who isn't even blood related to you and who abused the person who IS blood related to you and who actually brought you up i.e. your mum. What kind of bullshit is that?!

Don't get me wrong, I know Gazza's ill and fucked up and I know he's like, one of the greatest footballers this country's ever produced. But you can't excuse his behaviour and actions just because once upon a time he knew how to kick a ball about and score some goals.

And why was he even let out of the Priory when he was clearly still insane?! I didn't get that part... the man's rambling on about bad luck with odd numbers and phone calls to the Pope and yet he is allowed back into society to roam free and do whatever the hell he likes? How did he even manage to travel from country to country in the state that he was in? Who was letting him board his flights?!!

And Sheryl's like, "I'm doing it for the kids, the kids want him back in the house."

Errr if the "kids" wanna live with him so badly, they are old enough to move out and move in with Gazza elsewhere! And then they can put up with all the violence, the outbursts, the insane ramblings, the odd behaviour, the non-stop drinking...

Nah didn't think so.

The whole thing was just fucked up and bullshit. Leave the man alone. If he hasn't realised by now what he's doing wrong, then that's his business. Only he can help himself at that point, no one else. And if he never realises, then oh well. That's life I'm afraid. That's his decision to make.

I'm gone.

BLESS

X Factor voting details - errrr WTF?!

Check this out everyone:

TOTAL VOTES CAST OVER ENTIRE SERIES : 16,469,064

Show 1
Eoghan Quigg 21.19%
Scott Bruton 19.48%
Laura White 16.99%
Diana Vickers 7.35%
Daniel Evans 7.21%
Alexandra Burke 7.20%
JLS 5.03%
Rachel Hylton 4.77%
Austin Drage 3.63%
Ruth Lorenzo 3.47%
Girlband 2.17%
Bad Lashes 1.51% (Deadlock)

Show 2
Eoghan Quigg 26.77%
Diana Vickers 16.24%
JLS 9.21%
Laura White 8.99%
Austin Drage 8.98%
Daniel Evans 8.23%
Alexandra Burke 7.15%
Rachel Hylton 5.01%
Scott Bruton 4.17%
Ruth Lorenzo 2.95%
Girlband 2.30% (Deadlock)

Show 3
Eoghan Quigg 20.73%
Diana Vickers 15.13%
Rachel Hylton 12.21%
JLS 10.81%
Ruth Lorenzo 8.93%
Alexandra Burke 8.83%
Laura White 7.53%
Austin Drage 6.22%
Daniel Evans 5.94%
Scott Bruton 3.67% (Judges)

Show 4
Eoghan Quigg 19.81%
JLS 17.00%
Diana Vickers 15.24%
Daniel Evans 10.83%
Ruth Lorenzo 10.25%
Alexandra Burke 8.82%
Laura White 7.38%
Austin Drage 6.86% (Judges)
Rachel Hylton 3.81%

Show 5
Eoghan Quigg 27.39%
Alexandra Burke 18.35%
Daniel Evans 13.77%
JLS 13.26%
Rachel Hylton 10.39%
Laura White 9.90% (Judges)
Ruth Lorenzo 6.94%

Show 6
Diana Vickers 31.30%
Eoghan Quigg 19.56%
Ruth Lorenzo 13.91%
Alexandra Burke 13.31%
JLS 9.91%
Daniel Evans 7.53% (Judges)
Rachel Hylton 4.48%

Show 7
Eoghan Quigg 31.79%
Diana Vickers 18.94%
Ruth Lorenzo 16.07%
Alexandra Burke 14.97%
JLS 11.75%
Rachel Hylton 6.48% (Judges)

Show 8
Alexandra Burke 24.53%
JLS 24.34%
Eoghan Quigg 19.58%
Diana Vickers 16.32%
Ruth Lorenzo 15.23% (Public)

Show 9
JLS 35.03%
Alexandra Burke 31.04%
Eoghan Quigg 21.14%
Diana Vickers 12.79% (Public)

Show 10 (Final) – At vote freeze
Alexandra Burke 44.02%
JLS 30.65%
Eoghan Quigg 25.33%

Show 10 (Final) – Final Result
Alexandra Burke 58.34%
JLS 41.66%


... So Eggnog won SIX out of 10 shows?!!

Oh my lady!

WHO THE HELL WAS VOTING FOR THIS GUY???

• Scott finished 2nd in the first week!
• Daniel never finished bottom!
• Alexandra won only one show outside of the final!

Revelations or what?!!

X Factor final 2008

What's good people?

Thought I'd take this opportunity to make some random observations and comments about the grand X Factor final that happened a couple of days ago.

• I wanted Alexandra to win, JLS 2nd and Eggnog 3rd - the British public agreed.
• I know Alexandra is a human being but all that hyperventilating and non-stop crying made me cringe.
• Beyonce smacked it - effortless.
• Alexandra's duet with Beyonce = very sweet.
• JLS = Blacklife - well done Louis (tit).
• Ronan Keating completely took over from Eggnog.
• Ronan Keating = ginger facial hair and wrinkly.
• Boyzone in general = looked like shit.
• I actually felt sorry for Eggnog.
• Cheryl's dress - nuff said.
• Cheryl's skin and bones look - nuff said.
• Dannii's curves - that's a good look.
• Rachel - was she even wearing make-up??!
• Hallelujah - should be Diana's song.

Overall, Alexandra was definately the deserved winner but after watching some of her past performances before she got booted off, I feel that Laura White was the best vocalist out the lot.

6 months to go until X Factor 2009!

Heads, shoulders, knees and toes...

Man dem lemme see you keep it sho!

Ladies lemme see you go down low!

Heads, shoulders, knees and toes! Heads, shoulders, knees and toes!

HAHAHAHAHA!

This tune is haaaaaard!

List of things that piss me off - pt. 2

11. When people make plans to meet up with you, then they dowse and don’t even bother to provide you with an explanation. Ignorant PRICKS.

12. Those fucking annoying generic ‘MySpace Hoes’ comments, e.g. “Just passin tru 2 show some luv! Hope all is bless... take it easy, don’t be a stranger 2 my page bbz xxx” – get out of here man. Oh and those blasted spam comments as well, and when people don’t even bother to delete them and allow them to clog up their page! WHY???

13. Dirty old perverts who try to add you when they have nuff skets in their top friends that they blatantly don’t know outside of MySpace, you bunch of sad bastards! Why would I want to be friends with a 49 year old man who's not in my family? FUCK OFF!

14. When old people try to shove past you when you’re getting on the bus, just because they’re old. Errrr if you wait two fucking seconds grandma, I’ll gladly let you get on first so you can take your seat at the front, but no, you’re too rasclart quick!

15. Speaking of old people on buses: when they don’t give you two seconds to give up your seat for them before they start moaning and tutting over having to stand and that kids ain’t got no respect... again, TOO QUICK. And besides, even if I don’t give up my seat, how do you if I’m not well enough to stand myself? Maybe I’ve got a fucking broken foot or some shit, maybe I’m up the duff for all you know?! So get the hell off my case you old demented bastards!

16. The N7 bus. I won’t even go into this one... nuff said.

17. Night buses in general. Nuff said.

18. When people try and tell me that I’m not really Scottish because I was born in London. Oh OK, so I have like, 10 generations of family that all come from Scotland, but I’m NOT Scottish? If I was born in Japan, would you say I’m Japanese? NO YOU WOULDN’T. People need to recognise that England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland are all separate fucking countries! Douchebags.

19. People that don’t know how to say ‘please’ or ‘thank you’.

20. People that interrupt other people when they’re talking, because they think that their point/story is more important and interesting when in actual fact most of the time it’s not, and then they don’t even bother to go back to what you were saying in the first place. MY GOD, that is one of the most annoying things in the world, I truly can’t STAND it when people interrupt others on a regular basis. Do yourself a favour and SHUT THE FUCK UP for once in your life! KMT!

And yes I did just write KMT! lol

I'm only playing.

Part 3 soon come.

JLS are screwed

So the X Factor final is happening this Saturday night coming.

And the 'special' guests that will be performing with the three finalists have been confirmed.

Alexandra has got BEYONCE.

JLS were supposed to have Rihanna but she's dropped out so now they have...

... wait for it...

WESTLIFE
..................................................................................

And Eggnog has BOYZONE.

Seriously... WESTLIFE and BOYZONE?! WHAT THE FUCK?! Is that REALLY the best Simon and Louis could come up with?! Louis' choice is especially lazy.

JLS and WestSHITE do not go hand in hand. It's safe to say they're blatantly NOT winning the competition now. From Rihanna to Westlife - they're PISSED.

I see Alexandra winning it now and I hope she does.

If Eggnog wins I think they might as well make this X Factor the last because that would be some straight bullshit right there and the show would literally lose all credibility that most people believe it lacks anyway.

OK I'm gone.

BLESS

Britney week on X Factor - the worst ever?

One thing that pisses me off about the X Factor is the way the judges all lick celebrity arse, especially Simon! As surprising as that may sound, it's true.

On Saturday's show Britney Spears made her long-awaited comeback on British television, performing for the first time in over four years.

And boy was it a let down!

Look, I'm a supporter of Britney. I'm perfectly aware of the shit she went through prior to her comeback and the media's disgraceful, inhumane treatment of her during all her mental problems. So I'm all for Britney getting back to her normal self and having a successful career once again.

However, she went on a show that functions through LIVE performances by amateur singers and she MIMED. She mimed, everyone. And what's worse, did anyone actually expect her to NOT mime? It was so predictable that she would not deliver a live performance. I don't give a fuck if she was dancing or not because her dancing wasn't all that either. If you can't dance and sing at the same time, then don't do both. Just sing. Simple as that.

Is it just me or did she look slightly uncomfortable and like she was kinda unsure of herself? I don't think that was the same Britney as before... maybe she was too nervous. Plus her hair and make-up sucked. Who was styling this woman on the night? Whoever you are, you should blatantly get sacked.

And then she gave the vaguest, shortest and most useless answers in history to Dermot when he questioned her about the show and the contestants! That made me cringe so much. It was obvious she hadn't bothered to watch any of the performances beforehand. This was confirmed when I read later on that Simon had approached her in her dressing room and asked if she had been watching backstage and she told him no, leaving him visibly gobsmacked.

Why didn't she watch them? Why didn't she give masterclasses or whatever they're called to the contestants, like all the other guests have done? What was the actual POINT in her being there???

And then, to top it off, Miley friggin' Cyrus - who is like, 10 years younger then Britney - comes out of nowhere and sings live and in tune while dancing at the same time! What's that all about, eh?!!

I'm sorry, but it was just so pathetic. Britney is quite possibly the most overrated, over hyped recording artist in history.

Britney week SUCKED!!!